I know that someday you'll find better things.

Friday, March 21, 2014

Conspiracy Theory 101

UPS and Murphy's Law are in cahoots, and I have proof.

I was excited about the impending arrival of the headlights for Russ's truck, but I knew there was nothing I could do but gaze at them until he (and the truck) returned home from work. I had accepted this fact prior to the delivery, and I prayed the torture time would be minimal.

What time were the parts delivered? 
8 a.m.

The big brown box sat mocking me for hours and hours.

On the other hand, the Hoover SteamVac Carpet Washer with Clean Surge, F5914900 was listed as "out for delivery" as of 7:05 this morning. If my anticipation of the headlights was enthusiastic, the eagerness I've felt toward the delivery of this cleaning machine borders on excruciating.

The calendar was cleared for today so that I could spend maximum time indulging in my favorite vice. Dreams of this day pulled me through the challenges of the week-- Tuesday's root canal, Wednesday's math test, Thursday's Thursday-ness. 

I've fantasized about all the rug regions I'll clean, and I've carefully selected my first area-- the foyer rug--as the test zone. Scissors wait patiently-- far more patiently than I--on the window sill so that the box can be opened immediately.

I've even taken the "before" pictures.

Foyer rug-- before

Here it is, past noon, and still no ding of the doorbell.
The day is half-over, and I don't even hear a faint rumble of the UPS truck.

Adding to my misery, it seems that Murphy has partnered up with big business, too.

Amazon has reduced the price from Monday's $191.97. Today (Friday) it is listed as $138.97 with free Prime two-day shipping.

This is identical to the price I found (and paid) at the Home Depot website on Monday after a significant amount of time scouring the internet for the very best price.

Heaping on insult to injury, there was an additional $11 fee during checkout at Home Depot-- tax? Shipping? I can't remember.

But Amazon, oh, Amazon, where we have a gift card just waiting to be used-- Amazon was offering an additional $10 off coupon today.

I rest my case.

Why does Murphy always side against us?

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